Expelled

Ben Stein Has Not Been Expelled!

By Stephen L. Gibson

(Permission granted to submit/publish/redistribute, so long as author is appropriate cited and credited:

Stephen L. Gibson, Truth-Driven Strategies L.L.C. Any notice of use is appreciated.)

Ben Stein and the Discovery Institute have a new movie coming out, “Expelled,” about Intelligent Design. What a great country we live in where Michael Moore and Ben Stein can make movies and share their ideas, even if they are at times overly simple, one-sided, and/or agenda-driven. Still, because humans like me are emotion-driven thinkers rather than truth-driven thinkers, I thought I should chime in on Stein’s film before the hype begins—since I have little doubt from the trailers and Ben’s early promotional appearances that the film will initially appear quite compelling (in the same way 9/11 conspiracies and infomercials can at a quick glance).

Ben Stein reminds me of a fictional character in my recent book about the origins of our beliefs—in that case a doctor from one of those Central American, cancer-curing, quack-incubating clinics that claim to possess suppressed antidotes to everything from cancer to AIDS. Such doctors lash out at the FDA and threaten the FTC for refusing their rights to free speech, alleging that they are not allowed to make their medical claims known to the public. They say their proof is suppressed by a conspiracy of “greedy industry” and “parochial science.” The real problem, of course, is that such good doctors have no reproducible, predictive science that has ever been verified in the laboratory. Unfortunately for Ben Stein, in the case of Intelligent Design, he’s in the same pickle.

The truth is that as yet—and I sincerely wish these well-meaning theologian/scientists all the luck in the world—Intelligent Design makes no affirmative claims, has nothing to teach, and is not testable! It won’t help us get to Mars, it doesn’t explain the origins of the universe or anything else, and it doesn’t predict anything—a real problem for a supposedly scientific theory on equal footing with evolutionary biology. This overly-simple “science” of Intelligent Design is tantamount to saying, “Evolution can’t prove there is no god (nor does it try), so therefore god did it all! And if you disagree, you are stifling my free speech and expelling me from the science community and institutions of higher learning.” Whilst true that god could well have done it all, Mr. Stein’s “theory” offers us a large helping of … nothing.

Actually, Ben Stein has not been expelled from school, he’s just the nerd bully who constantly asks irrelevant and inappropriate questions during class. “Gee Mr. Biology teacher, what if god had wanted to place the electrons in the nucleus rather than have them orbit the atom?”

“Benny, I appreciate your curiosity, but this is the science classroom. Perhaps you could ask that question again in one of your other classes?”

Now crying and screaming, Benny responds, “But why? Why am I not allowed to ask my questions here in the science classroom? This is a free country! I have first amendment rights!” (If you don’t believe me, see his promotional appearance on Bill O’Reilly’s show, available on Youtube.)

Again, keep in mind that little Benny has not posited any scientific theories at all! He’s not published a single peer-reviewed paper that makes any scientific claim about how the world really works, according to Intelligent Design. He and his Discovery Institute friends are simply saying, “It was a miracle, and current science doesn’t explain this! … Oh. Say what? Science found the answer to that mystery? Okay then … well … How about this? Current science doesn’t explain this! See, I found a new miracle!”

Indeed the emperor has no clothes, and Ben’s supposedly “disallowed questions” are suggesting nothing more than the same magic miracles offered by the metaphorical cancer doctor who cannot get mainstream science to accept his miraculous cures. The doctor and Ben Stein have the same problem—a lack of any reproducible, measurable predictions.

“What or who created the universe?”

“Magic/god,” says Ben Stein.

As Dr. Michael Shermer has said, okay, suppose that is true for a moment, Ben. Is class over now? What do we teach in science class about this “theory?” Even if we allow the possibility that Ben’s view is correct, it leaves us with nothing to teach! It doesn’t answer the important question, how! It simply subordinates curiosity to a preconceived answer: “magic did it.” (Note: this is clearly part of the reason Bush-appointed Judge Jones sided so emphatically against Intelligent Design in the now-famous Dover trial.)

Still, my personal views may shock you: Teach more religion and Bible courses in the public schools, not less. Teach more about Intelligent Design, not less. Teach more mythology and comparative religion, not less. Doing so is the path to a better understanding of the world, and of our human connectedness to one another and to nature. There is more to the human equation than science, reading, and math. But that said, just don’t masquerade any of it as science until you actually do something in the lab that can be verified—until you have a genuine scientific theory that is testable, predictive, and capable of offering something that can actually be taught.

Then, Mr. Stein, when you actually do propose and prove something in the affirmative, you can collect your $1 million Nobel Prize as well—for incidentally disproving evolutionary theory in the process. At that point I—and much more importantly, the world’s great scientists—will rise to congratulate you and honor your achievement. Until then, you won’t be expelled, but you just might be asked to stop shouting out “Your wrong! You’re wrong! You’re wrong! And I should be free to say so!” in the middle of class. Doing so is disrupting and irritating to your classmates who actually want to learn something.